Age Before Beauty, Asshole

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/02/20/us/politics/20elect.html?pagewanted=2&_r=1&hp

Going against my better judgment in keeping undertones of the current political climate OUT of the asshole blog, today, I simply could not resist. A lovely defense lawyer on her choice to make the switch from Clinton to Obama, as quoted from the NYT:

“Some elderly women I’ve heard say, ‘I want to see a woman president before I die,’ and I know that’s why some of them are supporting Hillary,” Ms. Liedtke said in an interview after seeing Mr. Obama last weekend in her town.

“But you know what? That’s a selfish reason to vote for a president just because you want to see a woman before you die,” she added. “What about the kids coming up? I feel we should vote for the young people.”

Yes, Ms. Liedtke, I wholeheartedly agree with your sentiment and rationalization for voting for the ‘young people,’ voting for ‘the kids coming up,’ voting for Obama. When I think about the status quo of our fair country, I say to myself, “Self, there is only one distinct solution to problems like economic recession and war, only one real remedy capable of cleaning up the mess of administrations past and creating a new mess for establishments of the future.”

Let’s do it the Liedtke way, and just ‘…vote for the young people.’ Who needs experience, anyway? Or old people for that matter! Let’s hold hands and walk this road together, blindly, as we chant and cross our fingers. I mean, international diplomacy will totally work itself out, right? Look at Posh and Becks—they’re international. And amidst the harsh rumors of scandal and deceit, they stayed together. Duh, diplomacy! AND, they now live in harmony, that’s right, in the good ole U-S-A!

Whitney said it best and I concur, I believe the children are our future. But hey, Liedtke, check yourself, before you wreck yourself. While I’m all for handing down crucial decisions like disarming transnational dictators, funding international disasters also known as war, and reestablishing our reputation and primacy as THE global superpower, what I’m not down for is putting all my eggs in the theoretical basket of a ‘young person,’ neither because they’re ‘young,’ nor for the ‘kids coming up.’ Do you know what kids do when they find themselves in trouble—and trouble ranges from laundry, to bills and the road of self discovery: that’s right, Liedtke. They call their parents. Why? Because they feel compelled to consult an adult with a broader range of life experiences to, if you will, ‘school them.’ Or simply, to save their ass. Right now, I think it’s pretty safe to say that our country’s ass needs quite a bit of saving. So, let’s do the logical thing and promote the purity of youth and innocence—let’s do it for the kids, baby, yeah! Judgments like these shouldn’t be left to petty details like gender and ethnicity bias, they should totally be determined by number of wrinkles in your crows feet, grays in your hair, photographs of you in those water filled platforms (with the little goldfish), workin’ it, workin’ it, ownin’ it at Studio 54.

I know I heard this somewhere, but isn’t it best to vote on the issues or something? Is charisma and rhetoric enough to restore the eminence that was once ours? So Liedtke, I salute you—let’s do it your way. POWER to the youth! I’m totally writing in Mary Kate and Ashley for Prez—I mean, their global prowess and business savvy as mini moguls and kiddie stars make them a perfect fit for the US presidency, Liedtke styles—AND just like Bill and Hill, we’re getting a twofer—the idyllic angel/devil duo (which is much more obvious with MK’s hair hues—brunettes are SO emancipated this spring.) Just think…their taste will do WONDERS with that Oval Office. But such begs the question, can we really trust our youth (yeah…I was thinking the same thing…why did Heath’s masseur call her three times, anyway?) to lead? Maybe…on Lifetime movies and reality series.

Liedtke, darling, when it comes to the presidency, I think fondly of a line favored by my own [very striking, might I add,] mother: Age before beauty, Asshole!