Infomercials and Asshole Consumers

Sarah Silverman: My boss is stuck in Cleveland – I have work too. Yoda’s assistant made me a quadruple espresso. These things are like crack

Gisele: work is for assholes. this suckssssssssssssss i just drank "5 hour energy". i saw it on an infomercial last night at 1 am. i'm the ultimate consumer

Sarah Silverman: OMG I always see that and want to try it. Let me know what it does.

Gisele: oh totally!!! other than a little acid reflux, it seems alright to me...it tastes like asshole

Sarah Silverman: Eww you’ve tasted asshole gross!!!

Disclaimer: I have not actually tasted asshole, but should I have had the misfortune, I would imagine it tastes something like the berry flavored, 4 calorie, "5 hour ENERGY' shot which I purchased and consumed earlier this morning. "Feel it in minutes. Lasts for hours," Asshole.

Daria Morgandoffer: haha ya

*sidenote: gisele has not actually dappled in the backdoor tasting

Thank you, Daria, for bringing this important information to the attention of the masses.